


Shattered

by Pineprin137



Series: Mated [9]
Category: Supernatural RPF
Genre: Alpha Jared Padalecki, Alpha/Omega, Caring Jared Padalecki, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Grief/Mourning, Heavy Angst, Hurt Jensen Ackles, Implied/Referenced Character Death, M/M, Omega Jensen Ackles
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-26
Updated: 2019-10-26
Packaged: 2021-01-03 21:03:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,148
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21185948
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Pineprin137/pseuds/Pineprin137
Summary: Jared waits... until the moment Jensen needs him. Because no matter what, he will be here for his mate.





	Shattered

**Author's Note:**

> This one is a doozy, guys. Sorry for the downers lately, I'm trying to get back to fluffy domesticity but it's evading me right now. 
> 
> The title is inspired by "Wishing You Were Somehow Here Again" by Andrew Lloyd Webber. In The Phantom of the Opera, Christine sings it while walking through the graveyard. The emotions I feel while listening to that song... Well, that's how I imagine Jared and Jensen are feeling in this.

Jensen moves through the week with a comfortable ease that upsets his alpha greatly. He makes phone calls, arranges catering and even sets up the venue while Jared watches from the sidelines, anxious about what’s to come. It can’t last, this eerie calm. At some point, his omega is going to have to face what happened. But until that happens, Jared can only hover and wait to catch him when he inevitably crumbles under the pain of his monumental grief. 

“Jen? The car is here. Are you ready?” Jared keeps his voice soft and gentle, afraid to break his mate’s carefully constructed facade. 

Jensen walks out of the en suite dressed in a sleek black suit. His hair is still damp from his shower and there are shadows under his muted green eyes. An intense wave of sadness and determination surges through the bond before the omega locks it away. 

“Yeah. I’m ready.”

He walks past Jared without touching him, same as he’s done for the past week and it pains the alpha to see his mate struggle. He wants so badly to help Jensen, but the omega isn’t letting him, pulling away and maintaining a safe distance whether they are in the car or lying in bed at night. 

During the church service, Jensen keeps his eyes forward, gaze hovering just above the polished wood holding his mother’s body. Every ounce of his body frozen as if it is made from stone. Jared sits next to him, their thighs touching only because the pews are full. Donna was loved by many and he knows the graveyard will be filled with well-wishers too. He wishes he could take his mate’s place, shake their hands and put on a polite smile as they shower the family with condolences, some heart-felt; most obligatory. 

At the gravesite, the likeness between Jensen and his father is almost too much for Jared to bear. Mackenzie is sat between them, a tissue in her hand and tears on her face. The alpha decides then that he will be the one to offer her some small piece of comfort. She’s falling apart while the men on either side of her remain silent and detached. Jared knows why his mate is doing it, but he wishes Jensen would at least offer a hand to his little sister so she has something tangible to hold onto. 

The wake is beautiful. Jensen did a wonderful job of organizing the floral arrangements and selecting enough finger foods to keep people occupied while they mingle. Jared sits on the stairs and brushes one of the cream-colored lilies hanging from the banister. Donna loved lilies, insisted on providing them at Jensen and Jared’s engagement party. She probably would have tried to convince the boys to include them in the wedding, had they had one. 

Mackenzie approaches and he looks up. 

“Hi.” Her voice wavers and she licks her bottom lip as tears pool in her eyes. 

Jared holds out his arm and coaxes her onto the step beside him. She sits gingerly, perching on the edge in her black lace dress. Jared gently guides her head onto his shoulder and she sobs into her brother-in-law’s jacket. He rests his head against hers and lets the tears fall into her hair.

On the drive back, Jensen is silent, leaning his head against the window while Jared stamps down the urge to make him speak, break down, do  _ something _ … 

The house is dark when they enter, Jared pauses and reaches for his mate, “Jen--” 

“I’m tired. I’m going to go… ” The omega’s voice is as dull as his eyes and he vaguely gestures down the hallway when he can’t seem to finish his thought. When he finally looks in Jared’s direction, it’s like he doesn’t actually  _ see  _ his alpha. Instead, looking through him, searching for something. 

Jared frowns and watches him walk towards their bedroom. He feels so useless, helpless, and it aches so bad he leans against the wall to try and catch his breath. The silence is unsettling. It’s rare that their home is quiet, typically filled with Jared’s mutterings as he grades or Jensen’s off-key singing while washing the dishes. But the atmosphere today is sullen, devoid of any life. It matches their mood perfectly. 

He doesn’t rush down the hallway. He lingers at the family picture from last Christmas. All the Ackles and Padalecki's in one frame, it was a monstrous feat and everyone had been relieved when it was achieved in only three shots. The couples aren’t standing together in the photo but somehow it’s still evident who goes with whom. Like he could draw a line from one to the other and connect the mated pairs.  _ One half of a whole _ … 

When Jared’s eyes roam over the Ackles patriarch, his heart aches for the man. To have the love of his life taken away so suddenly… He doesn’t know how Alan is still doing it, walking, talking... Breathing. The alpha knows that if were to lose Jensen, he wouldn’t be able to go on without his mate. Jared would welcome death. 

Pushing off the wall, he pulls his tie loose and removes his suit jacket. He should be able to breathe easier, now that the constricting material is gone but he can’t. Not until he finds his mate, eases his omega’s suffering, holds his husband in his arms. 

The door doesn’t creak when he opens it and Jared’s grateful. He lays his jacket on the arm of the chair and walks over to the bed. He toes off his dress shoes and then crawls onto the bed next to his mate. Jensen is facing him but his eyes are closed. He isn’t asleep, just hiding away from the intensity of his grief. Jared lies with him, their bent knees not quite touching, their breaths mingling in the empty space between them. 

“Jared…” Jensen’s voice is pained and he swallows after speaking his mate’s name. 

“I’m here, Jen.” He keeps his voice to a whisper. 

“ _ My mom is dead… _ ” The omega’s voice breaks and when he opens his eyes, a loud sob breaks the silence. 

Jared moves closer and pulls the grieving man into his arms. So many emotions flow through the bond that Jared is dizzy with them, but he holds on. 

Jensen tires himself out after a while and Jared lets his exhausted mate sleep. He strokes the omega’s soft hair and brushes the drying tears from his face. He fills their bond with love and peace. Easing his mate’s restless sleep, feeling his body relax into Jared’s. 

Jared wakes when intense terror fills his mind. He pulls Jensen close, until they are flush and rocks him. A thought comes through the bond… _ _

_ don’t leave me… _

Jared hugs his mate tightly and kisses the top of his head, fighting tears once again. 

  
  


_ I’m not going anywhere. _


End file.
